I Kan't Spell
Social Distortion Tonight
A friend of mine just dropped two tix in my lap to attend Social Distortion tonight at the Ram's head.
Ball and Chain anyone? I'm gonna go but I'll be more than likely at the bar...ill let you know how mullet fest goes.
I don't know about you - but its still a really good song for what it's worth...
And I'll put on one my favorite songs from 95' - Banditos!!!
Restaurant Week in Baltimore 2007
Just for the people who - well - don't have much taste - I'll list restaurant week up here. Every freind of mine that works in a place for restaurant week is so ennamored by the people that come in and order the food on the short list menu. They, and I, find it rather appaling - but...if you must go during this fat Arbutus/Harford county patron week then please - - tip.
Here is your list sans link - -
b, A Bolton Hill Bistro - excludes Saturday and Sunday
Lord Baltimore Grill
Mem Sahib Indian Cuisine
Maggie Moore's Irish Pub
Rams Head Tavern
Tug's Bar & Grille
Blue Agave Restaurant
Bicycle Bistro -excludes Saturday and Sunday
The Wine Market - excludes Saturday and Sunday
The Black Olive
Timothy Dean Bistro
Ze Mean Bean Café
Café Hon - excludes Saturday and Sunday
Dave & Buster's Grand Sports Café
James Joyce Irish Pub and Restaurant
Fleming's Prime Stakhouse & Wine Bar
Oceanaire Seafood Room
Blue Sea Grill
Bistro 300 at the Hyatt Regency Baltimore
The Capital Grille - excludes Saturday and Sunday
Legal Sea Foods
Houlihan's Restaurant - excludes Saturday and Sunday
McCormick & Schmick's
Mondo Bondo Italian Bistro - excludes Saturday and Sunday
Mo's Crab & Pasta Factory
Rusty Scupper - excludes Saturday and Sunday
Tir Na Nog Irish Bar & Grill Wharf Rat
Aldo's - excludes Saturday and Sunday
Da Mimmo - excludes Saturday and Sunday
Della Notte of Little Italy
Velleggia's Italian Seafood Restaurant
George’s on Mount Vernon Square
The Prime Rib - excludes Saturday and Sunday
Restaurante Tio Pepe
Roland Park and vicinity:
Crossroads Restaurant Loco Hombre
Petit Louis Bistro
University Club at Towson
The only places I can recommend going to because the menu isn't all that cut back are George's, Maggie Moore's, and Ruth's Chris (they left the tenderloin on the menu...) So if you have a great experience at any of these or other places...don't be afraid to let me know. I'll be going to Taste and the Bolton Hill Bistro this week - - but that's about it and I feel guilty about that. hahaha
Song of the Day: Leave My Kitten Alone
The one great thing about the Detroit Cobras - that I forgot to tell you. Their sexual overtones are insane - and fucking GREAT!
This is a reallty old song btw that was done by the Beatles and Long Willie and tons of tons of blues men - - but they put their own twist on it - -
20 minutes of conversation just makes you...
want to listen to this...
Nothing does it the same way - not even close - I'll never be out of love. I'm just not built like that.
Dan Deacon to play Virgin Festival
After being invited to Pitchfork in Chicago a few weeks ago - Dan Deacon is now playing the Virgin Festival this weekend in Baltimore. And I WILL BE THERE!!!
IN case you forgot or haven't followed the progression of D the Deacon then here is a taste
I will also be seeing Spoon, Interpol, Bad Brains, Wu Tang and...sorry Mike - - The Smashing Pumpkins. It'll be hot but it'll be free and I'll be a happy guy. I love concerts... I know no one will buy tickets just for Dan Deacon (and hell I wouldn't go unless it was free) but check him out on YouTube the days following the festival - im willing to bet given that he was added late, and the people that normally see him won't spend 80$ to see him that I'll be one of the lone few in that smelly ass tent. VIVA LA WATERWORLD!!!
Deacon moment - -
If you honestly can't see it then - I suggest you just try a little harder...
Convo about Dan Deacon on IM with the friend that I am going with:
bretbliam: Holy bat cave I didn't know Deacon was playing...
DanDeaconLover: Who the fuck is that?
bretbliam: this is dan deacon in case you were wondering
bretbliam: yeah man
bretbliam: just one word for it
bretbliam: hes my friend
DanDeaconLover: I mean
DanDeaconLover: it's not bad
DanDeaconLover: but he looks like I would have beat the crap out of him in high school
bretbliam: thats fine
DanDeaconLover: and I was a loser
bretbliam: he knows that
bretbliam: but thats why hes awesome
bretbliam: because hes just a crazy legend now
DanDeaconLover: he's a legend?
bretbliam: in baltimore
DanDeaconLover: in his own mind maybe
bretbliam: in baltimore the guy is untouchable
bretbliam: he played pitchfork
bretbliam: i mean you have to have some clout to be from baltimore and play the virgin festival
bretbliam: think about it
DanDeaconLover: this song makes me want to cut myself
bretbliam: well then you can just smoke pot while I rock this out
bretbliam: wait til you smell it in there...
DanDeaconLover: will do
DanDeaconLover: i bet 300 would look absolutely incredible on blu-ray
bretbliam: I see how pumped you are!
It makes sense...
See the rain on the street
The way the cars shine
And the scotch that she drinks
With her lips so fine
And her shoulders go weak
As she closes her eyes
Oh, my God, when she was mine
See how she moves through the door
How she loses her keys
How she loses her cool
Watching blackbirds scatter through the trees
How she flips from the back to the front
Oh, my God, I miss those things
And it's a hard way to fall
And this ain't the easy way down
And it's a hard thing to love anyone, anyhow
So if it's gotta be you
Treat her nice
Hold her hand
And tell her twice
That she doesn't have to worry
And it will be alright
It's alright this time
It's alright this time
See her smiling at him?
That used to be me
I could find her in a thunderstorm
Just by the way that the rain would fall
And we used to be something
But somethin' happened to me
Oh, my God, when I was free
And it's a hard way to fall
And this ain't easy way down
And it's a hard thing to love anyone, anyhow
And it's a hard way to fall
And this ain't the easy way down
And it's a hard thing to love anyone, anyhow
To live in Baltimore is one thing. To live in the cushiness of one of the boroughs, whether it be Mt Vernon, Federal Hill, Fells or the dreaded Canton is quite another. The people living there don't really live in Baltimore. They don't live in what America sees as "The Wire" Baltimore. They don't even smell that aspect of the city. They'll hop on 95 before taking route 40 and they think Broadway is a nice street because they've never been above Lombard.
Last night after helping Doug move some stuff I decided to walk home as opposed to taking a taxi. I could have walked to Lombard and made a left and gone over to Calvert St. and gone all the way up and had a very mild and safe trip home. It was a trip I would have walked a 100 times. But I always say "I'm from Baltimore." But what did I really know about the Baltimore that most people don't get to see? What did I know about the other 80% of our city? I felt like a fraud. I felt like a tourist for the first time in my life.
So I headed north. I was on Broadway, which isn't all that bad all the way up to about Fayette st. and the Hopkins campus. The one thing I noticed is that you have to walk through little Mexico/Honduras/Guatemala on your way there. In this section there are a ton of food shops, bars, and oddly porn areas. None of them are run to any sort of scale that would have willed me into a purchase but it was interesting to see the community bustling. People were coming in and out of stores and the barstools at the corner dive bars were all full.
Once you hit the Hopkins campus you notice something right away.
You notice that there are police "booths" on every corner. I waived at each officer in the booth but was returned a glance that either said "He must be buying drugs." or "He's already high and is being an asshole." One cop looked at me so nastily that I really thought he was going to come out of his little "booth" and shake me down. At which point I would have started to laugh and would have said something like "nice office douche bag".
So on I pushed. I reached the Johns Hopkins hospital, which oddly is not even close to as nice as the college campus, but it is still relatively clean and guarded. The construction in this area is amazing to see. In 5 years this will be a new revitalization and home to half million dollar condos and new breath. But as of now it is Baltimore like most borough dwellers don't like to see and it is Baltimore that I knew existed but had rarely ever slapped hands with.
Before we go on we need to be honest with each other so as to bring as much truth to this story as possible. Baltimore is a black city. The African American population here is almost 70% of the city and most of them live in centralized impoverished areas that are full of crime and poor living standards. Now, unlike what you see on old bad TV or even on The Wire, families live here, grandmothers, children run and play in the street with careless abandonment just like they do in your old neighborhood. The environment that surrounds them is only defined to us by the one's that are looking in from the outside. If you were to ever be in those neighborhoods you would find that the children often play the same as you do, the families celebrate the same as you do, and even more so than you are probably used to...they look after their own. So with that being said, I will say that I did not see a single White or Asian face until I reached back to my home base.
After I passed Hopkins I could tell that the atmosphere had changed. I was a little tenser in the shoulders as I walked on. Everyone was out on their stoops leaning into cars with music blasting. They were doing each other's hair into braids. They were gathered around a small grill cooking hotdogs. There were children playing barefoot in glass filled alleys with a whiffle ball. And every eye seemed a little harder than the last as I moved towards more and more boarded up rows of homes.
The amount of homes that were boarded up or had trash falling out of the front was disheartening, disgusting, and painful. I wasn't shocked to see this sort of blight, as I have driven past such things, but to walk past and see people sleeping in pizza boxes and to smell the stale urine that pours out onto the street where children play and families gossip, was an awakening. I pushed on and made eye contact with everyone I could. I wasn't scared but I wasn't at ease. I got some head nods from the younger men and my fair share of "sup's?" I high-fived a little boy that was running next to me as if I were a carnival attraction. I'd imagine not too many white males with all of their teeth stroll down this street too often, but I could be wrong. So seeing his startled amazement that made him want to run next to me down the street wasn't surprising. It seemed as though I was an anomaly but at the same time I never felt threatened or in danger. I actually felt pretty warmly received.
But the eyes always hold a little bit of ember in them. Even though a cat may seem docile in the house, somewhere in it's lineage it is tied to the tiger and lion and you can see it in their eyes. Even though their easy going style of life that consisted of stoop hair braiding and chatting through open car windows seemed harmless the actuality is that, much like a cat, they were tense and very alert.
I pushed on to Preston St, my street, and made a left. I had no idea I was still 18 blocks from home. And Preston St. didn't look nearly as friendly as the double wide lanes of Broadway. Preston St. looked like a bad day in Bosnia. The boarded up houses were now not just one or two per row, they were now one or two rows and some of the houses in the rows were hollowed out from fire. And you could tell that squatters were in the tenement by the flickering sheet coming out from the windows and since it was dark I could see hearths inside the hollowed out craters, burning their shadows onto the walls and alleys.
It was dark. The music and street chatter from Broadway had ceased. Broadway seemed like a distant memory of joy, as though it were almost a mardis gras eveing in comparison to the gloom of Preston. I was almost tempted to put my headphones on, my head down, and double time it home. "I can do 18 blocks in twenty minutes." I thought to myself. Then I remember why I came on this walk in the first place. I wanted to shed some tourist from me. I can handle myself like a man and if I act like a man, I'll be treated like one. I stuck my chin up and my chest out and I walked on. I was however, at this point, in the dark with the smell of beer and urine all around, and the occasional waft of weed, a little nervous.
I strolled on and saw what looked to be a block party but it was not. It was a semi-fight territorial rock throwing thing between women and children. I didn't think I would actually see any action, and I doubt this was high on the scale of action but this was definitely a confrontation of some sorts. On one side of the street in an alley a woman was yelling about being ripped off and she was being held back by what looked like her son and two other women. On the other side of the street there were 7 women playing cards on an outdoor patio table with open beers and children running around them picking up rocks and throwing them at the yelling woman. Their mother's insisted that they stop throwing rocks but the children paid very little attention. They were probably 10 or a little older, so they were about to hit puberty and likely very hard to control.
For some reason when I saw this I smiled. I smiled like someone seeing a humpback whale in nature. I felt as though I were watching an uncontrolled environment that could turn in any direction, even on me if I wasn't careful. I pretty much tip toed through the barrage of curse words and debris.
About 2 blocks later at Ensor street I spit on the ground. A mother had her child with her on the front step as I walked by and I spit. She yelled at me and the hairs on the back of my neck stood up. "Don't spit in front of my child. This ain't your neighborhood, we don't spit around children." She obviously said this for her own reasons. I was proud that she was proud enough to tell me not to spit in front of her daughter but perplexed that I was such a threat while 20 yards away children were throwing rocks at adults across the street. I understood it, but I have to say that her efforts of pride could be better filtered. I said I was very sorry and moved on.
The rest of the journey involved nothing more than burnt out buildings and a bridge. I was nearly home. I crossed over Guilford and saw two hippies walking their dog. The girl was wearing very short, tight green pants with one ass cheek hanging out and the man was wearing a loose fitting white t-shirt, jeans and a watch. I thought about if they actually knew what was only a 1/2 mile from where we lay our heads, would they still be looking like that? But isn't that Baltimore? Isn't everything in Baltimore a 1/2 mile from something new, something dangerous, and something strange? Was I a tourist on this visit? Absolutely. Am I still a Baltimore tourist? I think I am and I don't think I'll every really sleep in the under belly of this city. But there is not doubt I'll take this journey again and again. I felt alive. I even felt slightly at home in my city.
Wes Anderson Movie - The Darjeeling Limited
The Guy on the Balcony aka Nigel Godrich
If you look close you can see a little fat kid in a white shirt jumping up and down near the speaker...
Updates and All
Everything yesterday went great and I am just waiting the final formalities before I can start my life again. I'd like to thank everyone, and to let you know that I was very touched and surprised that so many of my friends sent me texts to ask me how things went. I felt very loved yesterday. Thank you all for your thoughts and even...prayers.
And just because you can't take the smile off my face this week...and in case you forgot...this video below is the greatest thing ever.
I left one part of Man Day 2007 out of the story....on the way back from DC, Doug and I switched to the radio and this song was just starting. Sadly and hilariously we sang the "new" updated lyrics - - and - - it was kinda creepy that we sang them word for word.
Well...potato wave - i'll catch you later on.
PDG - A Modern Classic
Because the kid is an automatic classic. This is his email signature...
Lawyer and Lawyer a New Age Law Firm
"Your safest way to stay outta Jail"
PDG@laywerandlawyer.com | 12222 S. Street | Baltimore MD 21202
Tel: 410-555-5555 (direct) | Fax: They don't let me use fax yet | www.lawyerandlaywer.com
Only the bolded items have been change to conceal identity.
Songs of the Day
If you have seen this live - you'll know that the kids today are way cooler than we were - - lol - - I got moshed by a 120 pound kid with skull and cross bones glasses and I wasn't even phased...I simply moved to the back of the room and said..."I'm too old for this shit."
Uh Oh Hello!!!!! "I know you like it when we fight!!"...ignore the crappy video
Mellowdrome - Oh My
Band of the Day: The Detroit Cobras
They are playing the Ottobar tonight. Not only have they toured with the Stripes - they have two die hard chicks with tats and they sing punk rock with the soul of Buddy Holly and the Chirelles...it's quite...different. I'll be there tonight with the forearm tattooed girl crew. Bring it on!
God who doesn't want to sleep with a Cobra??? hahahaha - If you look closely - that's Meg White in the Red Riding Hood outfit.
Cry on - she sounds like Janis in this wone
Baby Help Me
Man Day 2007
Thank God for Doug lately. Thank God for all the people that have been around me and let me hop back in the fold of fun and love. It's refreshing that people remember me the way I used to be. It's great that people remember that I love fun, life, observation, confrontation, laughter, jokes, and days of pleasure sans any *real* intoxicants.
Thank God for the new people that have art and filth in their heart. And even though they are now wildly successful (lol) and on tour - thanks for taking my calls and even returning them with thoughtfulness and resonance. Thanks for showing me that life is more than a stupid TV and yelling. Thanks to the new people as well. But seriously...shower a little more... *signed your live-in republican = Bret
Doug and I went to DC Monday and we had a man day. *it was a tad gay* but it was awesome none-the-less. I self-composed a song called man day as we walked up 6th on our way to G to find greasy Chinese food. It went something like this:
Going to see art
The spy museum too
What are two men to do
When in Dc waiting to see
A non-sexual rock band
They go to the art museums
And the Spy museum - -
...or something like that. It needs some work obviously. But I think the basis for the song is there.
The National Gallery of Art, other than Camden Yards, or most music venues, is probably the place that I want to be the most at any given time. Other than maybe in bed getting it on...<--lame I think Doug was skeptical at first of my foal whinnying of "Fill my soul...", "Favorite painting..." etc... But I think he got the idea when I ran to each room like a star gazing school girl to take in the Seurat I have neglected, or the Manet's that I have longed for, for so long. It was a really good time in there, the architecture, the history, the simple idea that you are in the presence of just unparalleled artistic greatness is knee buckling - to me. I did find a couple of new paintings. This is one - (waiting for Doug to send me the name again...I couldn't find it.)
So we left the Gallery after seeing "Journey of Life" by Cole and "Hide and Seek" by Tissot - two of my favorite painting (although the Journey of life was not in it's usual round room as you exited the impressionist area.) Hide and Seek has a very special place in my heart because I have never been moved by a person and a painting at the same time.
1 of 4 for Journey of Life
The infamous Tissot that has been moved to the "Small French Gallery" in the modern museum of shit - I mean art.
Then Doug and I schlepped it up to the Spy Museum and I am here to tell you that if you have a kid or are a kid at heart - then the Spy Museum will not only be up your alley but up your ass as well. It's a pay-per-museum but it is still worth it. They have tons of interactive games, and it's mostly about the Cold War, which means if you love the History channel then...trust me...you'll love the umbrella gun, the cigarette gun and the other crazy gadgets on display.
Dinner was more or less a wash when it came to the level of fare as we took in Thai food in lieu of the grease trap that was DC's Chinatown. It was ok but nothing to write home about. The conversation was good even though I am a bit manic and topsy turvy as of late.
A quick side note - and just because this may be the only way I can communicate with her and I know some people are curious. I missed her, yes. The day was originally planned for Jas and I as a possible last hurrah or a possible way just to realize that we both enjoy each other's company. But - for those who haven't noticed my girl has moved on to greener pastures. As a matter of fact she won't return my phone calls or text messages (might as well be as honest as possible) and I think she's starting to find my creepy. I can assure her that I am not creepy and that well...I just don't want to lose or not know someone I love. I just think everyone wants to be loved and thought about the way you love and think about them. Unfortunately, that isn't the case anymore. So yes - I missed her. I missed her a good bit during the Travis show (next event) but during the show I came to realize certain things. One: if someone doesn't want to know you, you are pretty pathetic if you want to know them. And two - I'm a good person, and I've done things and been good to her despite the fact that I made a mistake a long time ago, I think that my good will and love should shine through enough to still be acknowledged as more than just some asshole that calls her. If someone doesn't want to be around someone that loves them - then - ya know... let them go. So...anyway... I missed her. But seeing Travis and having fun and laughing and singing at the top of my lungs was probably the most therapeutic, cathartic thing I could have had happen.
So the Travis show was amazing. Doug and I had been to a Travis show before - the Beacon in like...04' or something. It was about the 10th time I had seen them and as we had beverages in the downstairs bar before the show I pointed out that it was the same people only...10 years older. It was cute but...for a concert...not promising as fas as the energy. We completely missed the opening of some guy with a guitar that I had never heard of...it's usually not like me to be dismissive of an opening act; as in actuality that is how I found Travis in the first place (opening for Oasis). But as of late I can’t be arsed into really doing it. I listened to one of his songs and he rhymed "ain't" with "paint" and I sorta quit after that. Back to the show...
I didn't know Doug was such a Travis aficionado - he even knew most of the new songs. Travis played all the great songs and some off the cuff one's as well. Doug and I (and I don't know about your 9:30 club knowledge ) found an air pocket right next to the stage, the speakers, and the bar. I couldn't honestly believe that a space like that was available since it was a sold out show - and then to look around and see the plethora of boyfriend/girlfriend/soccer mom/little Asian kids - I knew it wouldn't be hard to get close to the stage. Even though we were close we weren't creepy close - 27 and 29 year old males in the front row of a Scottish pop band jumping up and down without chicks...is well - in my opinion - creepy. So we were in our little area where we weren't really near anyone and I could pogo like the fruit that I am. And pogo I did - I dropped about 2 pounds in there that night and I sang every song at the top of my lungs.
Highlights of the night were Andy climbing the wall of speakers, Andy almost not making it, and the solo that ensued. Any time Franny talks it's just like watching peace personified. It's eerie how he can drop f-bombs and crack on the crowd and you still just want to hang out with him and play backgammon and maybe change his kid's diaper if he were to ask. The "Klaus" segment was pretty sweet and the fact that Nigel Godrich was in the house was like hearing that Elvis was there...if you don't know who that is...you should look it up. Flowers in the Window being played with the whole band singing sans instrument was heartbreaking for me but still great for the rest of the crowd. And then they closed with a cover of Back in Black...yep just a great show.
Here are some crappy clips of two songs from that night - neither of which I would have recorded. They wasted their footage on this and when "All I wanna do is rock" was in the set...momo's.
UPDATE - I FOUND SOME MORE -
Flowers in the Window
Back in Black Cover - not very good though - -
After the show we drove home and still sang Travis at the top of our lungs. We still had that good clean energy that comes after an exhausting show. We went to Doug's local for a second and to be honest it was the only time we really drank during the day. I mean we had a refreshing beer once and a couple beers at the show and one at dinner but there wasn't any intoxication. And we both looked at each other and sorta nodded and said "yeah...it's about time booze goes away." I couldn't agree more. We'll both love whiskey and would never shy away from a drink but I think at this point - we don't necessarily need or go looking for a drink in order to enjoy ourselves.
Doug my friend - it was one of the best days I've had in a really long time and I'm so very glad I got to spend it with you. Cheers.
For doug btw - the "Klaus" moment from another venue - -
Here it is in action at the show - fuckin pretty funny now that I remember it - poor Klaus
Exit Music (For a Love)/Film
My appropriate song for the day! I just love the drum come-to. A brilliant song by a missed artist - and by missed I mean Hail to the Thief was shit - thanks...
Name 3 nice things - I swear I couldn't do it. And then everything became very very very clear. Thanks! I'm just hurting everyone involved. Things like this help me to forget.
Wake... from your sleep
The drying of your tears
Today.. we escape
Pack and get dressed
Before your father hears us
Before.. all hell.. breaks loose.
Breathe... keep breathing
Don't lose.. your nerve.
Breathe... keep breathing
I can't do this.. alone.
Sing us a song
A song to keep us warm
There's such a chill
Such a CHILL.
You can laugh
A spineless laugh
We hope your rules and wisdom choke you
Now we are one
In everlasting peace
We hope that you choke.. that you choke
Greatest Album Ever Made #7 - Let it Bleed (the Rolling Stones)
Love in Vain
Let it Bleed - Easily my favorite Stones song ever - it just doesn't get better
You can't always get what you want! = fucking true as gold baby
You got the silver - is anyone cooler than keith fucking richard?!?!
One more reminder
Just another reminder that a friend of mine is trying to help feed the homeless. He is looking for volunteers. I mean shit you get to work on the rooftop of George's and meet some really good people in the Mt Vernon area. So...again...if anyone is interested you can crank into the evite above or just come with me on Saturday morning. I may even ride my new bike there...yep...I got a bike...*tear
The Last Hour: I have listened to just this...
"I'm dying...to put a little bit of sunshine in your life." Fuckin brilliant song...by a real strong song writer.
Do yourself a favor and enjoy it with the windows open relaxed somewhere and your eyes closed....
Band of the Day - Mates of State
Though they are now sorta rounding down...at one time they had a really great following. Possibly the cutest band in the world, as any band that is husband and wife usually are, Mates of State writes the pop that you listen to when you get out of the bathtub and are going to see some friends. Well if you are a chick...anyway - enjoy~
HA HA - God this is so catchy....
Fluke - Pretty much the same song...but you know - better.
Punchlines - Break down of the year - -
WCW Poem of the day
I could read the work of and histroy of William Carlos Williams every day for the rest of my life. It is such a reminder that the artist can be normal and still be an artist. Not everyone needs pain, isolation, and despair to be a great communicator of their art. Some people can be Doctors and live in suburban New Jersey and write the most beautiful things ever.
The Great Figure
by WIlliam Carlos Williams -- painted by Charles Demuth in 1928.
Among the rain
I saw the figure 5
on a red
to gong clangs
and wheels rumbling
through the dark city
Even though this movement (painting and poetry combined) didn't skyrocket - I loved that it was attempted. I mean if Dekooning and Pollack could have combined with WCW, Frost etc...it could have just been really amazing....
This is everyone's favorite "I love my wife" poem.
This Is Just To Say by William Carlos Williams
I have eaten
that were in
you were probably
they were delicious
and so cold
Band of the Day : Travis
On MOnday I'm going to see one of my favorite live bands ever; Travis. I know Doug and Blake can vouche for them but if you have never seen travis live it really is quite special. The story telling, the kindness, and the warmth yet rock of their music is just the ultimate combination for me. I have laughed, head butted, moshed (sorta), close to cried, and sighed at Travis shows. I can't wait for Monday!!!
Brittany Spears' - Hit me baby one more time
The concert classic - All i wanna do is rock...
Flowers in the Window crowd sing along - - I hope this goes down that night...that would make it all worth it.
At 40 bucks a pop it was kinda steep but this will be the first time I've seen them in a place like the 9:30 in almost 8 years. Wow...8 years... Their new album isn't bad but as they have gotten older they definitely don't bring the thunder anymore - they more or less sing lullabyes - which in actuality may be a really nice change of pace.
I saw this last night - and I won't put up all 4 parts but Michael Moore gets roasted and does some roasting. I'm going to go see it tonight at the Charles - its an open invitation if anyone wants to catch the 7 pm show.
Has anyone seen it?
Most Addicting Game Ever = KDICE
If you are a big Risk fan - - and come on who wasn't? Then you will love KDICE. There are online rankings and you get to play against people from Norway...awesomeness!
Bret <--- Gay
Something I do Want to Get Straight Though
Reading back through every post she's ever written there is only one constant; another man. I am not a constant. I am a blip for the most part in between tear jerked posts over someone I don't even know. Some people may think we never got along because of things that I did, but I can say with honest certainty that I never, ever, not once, not even close, felt like I was first. This just lead me to never believe anything that she said. I used to want to believe her. But her "I love you's" never came and her desire to do anything nice for me was never ever there. I mean never. I felt like a place holder. And I still really think I was. I never felt that way with Mirel. I felt genuine love from her. She used to hold me and tell me I was great and that we would always get through anything. She used to look at me when I wasn't looking at her. She would send me poetry in the mail and search for my hand when we walked.
J is the only person I have ever loved where I never felt the same love back. And I think that became very unhealthy and painful. And up until today I used to sit around and wonder why? But - even if she never knew what I did - she still hated me. She still loved another man every day and I could feel it. I could feel it all the time. And if she actually says that that was imaginary than that is just one more lie in a long string of them.
More than likely she won't say anything...or if she does it will be something spiteful. It will be something along the lines of "You are fucking right. He is amazing and I love him way more than I ever loved you." Because that's what she has always thought I deserved. She thinks I deserve to feel bad forever and the saddest part is that I would never say anything like that to her...and over the past few months I have tried to be as loving and patient as I can just to show her that it was a mistake and that we can be fixed...but I just don't think that is true at all. For while my injustice may have hurt I can still honestly say without any hesitation ever that I will love her at the drop of a hat at any time and anywhere. I will do anything and everything I can for her. Even in the past few months that we were not together I made sacrifices like letting her and a friend stay at my house and helping her out any way I can and having friends walk her home from work just so I know she'll be safe...I would still do anything for her...and to that I know right now she is nodding her head...she couldn't deny me that fact. But what I also know is that I am not loved...and I am not first. And that - well shit - that can't be fixed ever.
I always felt like I was runner up in the "who gets Jas' heart contest". And if now they are back together only to do whatever they do all again, that is more than likely where it should be - because given my current race of clarity - I can honestly see now that all my efforts were made in vain. I was trying to keep a river running into a bathtub forever - when it all it wanted to do was go back to the ocean...if the ocean would have it. Well apparently the ocean came back - and the river has met it once again.
Cheers. All my sincerest best. I love you.
Well I guess for a while I've been looking for closure from her. I always knew that she loved other's and moved in her way these days but in actuality, deep down inside, I still hoped and prayed every day that I was loved and that I would one day get her back and be loved again. But...I think...we all knew that wasn't going to happen.
So - for the past few weeks I've been looking for the magical word "closure". It's the moment when you know everything is over. Her closure may have been when I finally admitted that I had slept with someone else when we were first seeing each other and had gotten into a huge fight the night before. It may have been when I walked into the house fucked up and just said "I don't care anymore." I don't know when hers was - but I know she doesn't feel about me the way that I feel about her - so I do know that she had it. I know she has moved on. I know she lives her life without a thought of me in her head - and for that I also know she isn't heartbroken. She's just...over me.
My moment of closure came today. And while I won't go into specifics really - let's just say I threw a set of keys into the harbor with a kiss and dropped off the last of her things...and in actuality there was nothing in the bag i dropped off...it was just a reason to keep her in my life...that bag under my desk was my way of keeping her around.
"I'm coming to drop off your shit. Where should I bring it?" I had said that so many times and they were all a bluff - I never wanted that bag and her set of keys in the state they are now. I always wanted a reason...or a hope to keep them around. She opened the door today and she looked amazing as always...even if she'll say "I look like shit." Trust me...she never does. She called me crazy and weird and she was right. I have become crazy and weird thinking about all that I found out to be true today. All that sort of came to an end when she told me to keep my voice down and then she looked behind her to make sure no one was coming down the stairs. I said goodbye to the puppy I loved asked to kiss her on the forehead and then - I left. And this time...all of me left.
So now I'm sitting here more in a shock/awe mode than anything. My heart was in my socks the entire walk back to work. I stopped and bought a cd of the new Travis album so that I could listen to it before I (we) went to the concert. And then I remembered that a week I bought her a ticket so we could enjoy as many last things as possible before the moment of closure came. I was going to try to cram in one last day on the lawn in DC, at dinner, in the car singing Johnny and June. I was going to try to cram in one last great day with her. I was going to try to do it as many times as possible before she finally said "that's enough". Because she is what makes m heart beat and you can't really deny what you love. It looks like I never got to the point of her knowing how important just seeing her was. It looks like I never will.
She called and said "I can't stand to see you look like that." I dont think she ever will again. But honestly all she had to do - because I'm such a sucker for her and love her so much would be to reach out her hand and tell me it's all going to be ok. She didn't though. She decided to slam the door in my face. For her sake - I hope she doesn't ever worry about me. For as much good as I have tried to do for her and as much as I have tried to be there for her - the bottom line is - I failed her. And I don't deserve one moment of her remorse or guilt.
She talked to me moments after and explained that she shouldn't feel guilty and that I shouldn't make her feel that way...and she's right. She doesn't necessarily lie to me she's just living her life. And now...it's time for me to live mine. The moment of closure...while bittersweet and painful for all it is - can be rather liberating as well. I just hope the bay doesn't barge into my house with those keys.
So - I guess... for the last time on here I'll be writing one of these. And I just wanted to say that I love her. I still love her and always will. I love you all for how much you've tried to support me and guide me and now it's time for me to go love myself again.
Live Aide Earth Day 777 Sign of the Hippie
Did anything make a louder thud than whatever rediculous Al Gore inspired Earth Day - scare the people into believing they eat arsenic blah blah blah - travesty that went on this Saturday. I mean seriously - - what a fucking joke that thing was.
I loved the liberals calling for Bush's head whilst buying 6 dollar waters and listening to - what was it again - fucking Garth Brooks, Yarina, and Blues Nation. Wow. I mean WOW. Was Bob Geldoff busy? Did a 7th grade class write letters to get these acts to play? Man some rallying cry this fucking thing had.
The NYC one was a better lineup but - it was still sad to see the presenters as Kevin Bacon and Leonardo Dicaprio. I wonder if anyone in these audiences even know who the real thinkers like Chomsky and Zinn actually are; or if they just went out and rented Al Gore's fucking...whatever it was movie that scared people shitless but won't change a fucking thing.
Look I know he's evil. You know he's evil. Everyone knows that fuckin asshole is evil. What isn't going to rally people are half assed concerts headlined by the Police singing "Don't stand so close to me." We may be able to save some farms in Oklahoma thanks to Willie and the boys doing Farm Aid but you aren't going to slow down the Militarized complex and you sure as shit aren't going to go without gasoline. That's another interesting thought - how many of these hyprocritcal bastards drove their fucking SUV's down to DC or to NYC? Could they have not taken the train...or greyhound. Inconvenient (truth) ...I'll say.
The Yew Tree
Each passing limb
That tacks back at the tree;
With a hand in front
That allows your brain time to gather
is God's way of warning.
And in the time just before the yew snaps back
You get a glimpse of life
And death rolling on the floor.
One has a lantern.
One has a rod.
They race to the Agora with a mind
Whipped by the now slung back branch.
We move through the forest together.
EATS FOR THE STREETS
My friend Mark has decided to start a grassroots foundation for the homeless in Baltimore. Since I'm volunteering I also told him I would spread the word. If any of you fine people would like to be a part of something to help the homeless in Baltimore, and in case you haven't noticed - there are quite a few.... please call me or shoot me a mail at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Thanks for your attention:
Location: George's / The Peabody Hotel
612 Cathedral Street, Baltimore, MD 21201 US
When: Saturday, July 14, 11:00AM
I would like to invite you to the first 'Eats For The Streets'
Eats For The Streets is a grassroots attempt at helping homeless in Baltimore. Before moving here 17 months ago, I organized this same event in Colorado, and quickly discovered that even a small amount of grassroots effort -- by just a few people -- can make a BIG difference.
I’d like to invite you to George’s on Saturday, July 14th at 11:00 AM (the Orioles games doesn’t start till 7:00) – to help me make sac lunches for the homeless.
The Peabody has already agreed to let us use the kitchen, or the rooftop meeting room (depending on which is available.) And, it won’t take long either… an hour and a half at most.
Of course, because it’s George’s, you can certainly drink a bloody Mary while helping. In fact, I encourage it. The whole point is to bring people together to do something grassroots for the community… while having fun at the same time.
When we’re done, we’ll drop the lunches off at a local charitable organization that I’ve already contacted, which regularly serves lunch to the homeless.
Why are we making lunches for an organization that does it anyway?
Because the people who volunteer regularly need a break too. And I’ve found that by freeing up the people who work and volunteer at homeless-assistance organizations for one day…they are able to refocus their energy in other areas where they are able to achieve a greater impact.
Soooooooo... All you need to do is bring one item from the list below, and come on down!
On the Evite, if you RSVP please mention what you are bringing from the list, so others will know what to get as well. Ideally, I’d like to make 100 lunches! But please, don’t spend more than $10 to $15 on the item(s) you bring. I really want to keep this as simple, fun and inexpensive as possible, so everyone really has a great experience.
If you would like to be involved - contact me and I'll add you to the list.
Have a wonderful day!
Freddy Adu is Coming of Age
About 5 years ago you heard of this 13 year old kid that was going to be signed to the MLS and his face and name were everywhere. His ability to be articulate, charming, and calm as an early teenager was just something special to watch, even more special than his soccer ability.
5 years later - Freddy Adu has been traded from DC United, bombed out at a Man U tryout, and is basically teetering on name brand anonimity and was in danger of falling into the category of "most hyped athletes of all time."
If you watched the Poland game last night for the USA U20's you'll notice that Freddy Adu scored a hat trick and on the rating meter received a 10. I have only seen a 10 once and it was when Robbie Fowler scored 6 goals in a game against Sunderland. In order to get a 10 you can't lost one ball and all shots must be on target and well struck.
This is his first goal:
This was the 2nd:
Yeah - Freddy is back. He'll be there in 2010 and I wouldn't be surprised to see him get a cap with the big boys sometime soon. He can't be any worse than Twellman.
Song of the Day: Pulp - Common People
I have to say that when I saw Pulp live I have never come closer to an orgasmic experience, almost just being one with a band, and one with the crowd and just wanting to explode then when I saw them live and I saw them play this song. It is in my opinion the greatest song I've ever seen live. I remember I lost the person I was with and I didn't care. I hugged some really fat guy in front of me and I swear I almost cried.
Wait until the 2 minute mark and you'll see what I mean....it goes insane and the whole reason is the song is about us - the song is about you and me and it should be at some point in a young person's life - their fucking anthem. If it hasn't been your anthem then you haven't listened to it or you haven't really lived.
Thanks and love,
In case you didn't notice...and judging by the attendance you haven't, this is another in a line of long "1st Thursday Street Festivals" in Mt vernon. It usually has pretty good food and people because well...its Mt Vernon and not Federal Hill. So the guys in the striped shirts arent there but well...you have to put up with 9$ Gyros...I mean seriously who buys those things?
Anyway - here are the details. http://www.wtmd.org/1sthtur/julyjesseharris.htm
They don't do nearly enough to promote this. God there are so many jobs for me in my future....
I'll be at the crappy tapas next to the Besillica (sp?) place at like 6 if anyone wants to meet up.
Artist of the Day: Iron and Wine
Prison on rt. 41 - I could write a paper about this song it's so fucking good. The interpretation could go literal, religious, and romantic. It's an amazing piece of songwriting.
Jezebel - this is off the same EP and again - Sam Beam is just...well...in all honesty - possibly the best song writer I've ever heard. It's a tad repetetive in it's earthy, southern, religious, feminine verse but jesus - this is honestly something that I know I could never ever ever write. And that just makes me so MAD and happy and in awe all at the same time.
she was born to be the woman i would know
and hold like the breeze
half as tight as both our eyes closed
who's seen jezebel?
she went walking where the cedars line the road
her blouse on the ground
where the dogs were hungry, roaming
saying, "wait, we swear
we'll love you more and wholly
jezebel, it's we, we that you are for
who's seen jezebel?
she was born to be the woman we could blame
make me a beast half as brave
i'd be the same
who's seen jezebel?
she was gone before i ever got to say
"lay here my love
you're the only shape i'll pray to, jezebel"
The next time I hear someone say "Nick Cave ain't coming through that door so let's just appreciate (enter crap songwriter here) for what he is worth." I am gonna flip a shit and tattoo Sam Beam on his inner thigh. Iron and Wine I'm sure is a course in some college somewhere, the samy Dylan and The Beatles have their own courses. It fuckin should be.
Trapeze Swinger (Jas' Song) - I mean if this song doesn't make you almost want to cry then I don't know if you have a soul. When I own my own bar we are going to have "Sam Beam Night" and there will be no talking from 6-8 pm while he plays (could be moved from 1-130 am). We'll only serve domestic beer, whiskey, and gin during this time. And all we are gonna do is play Iron and Wine and pat each other on the back and look in the mirrors straight ahead and say "It's gonna be ok. Fuck it."
By the rosebush laughing
With bruises on my chin
The time when
We counted every black car passing
Your house beneath the hill
And up until
Someone caught us in the kitchen
With maps, a mountain range,
A piggy bank
A vision too removed to mention
Please, remember me
I heard from someone you're still pretty
They went on to say
That the pearly gates
Had some eloquent graffiti
Like 'We'll meet again'
And 'Fuck the man'
And 'Tell my mother not to worry'
And angels with their gray
Were always done in such a hurry
I could honestly say that I would want that played at my funeral. There's just no doubt in my mind. And I'm not even getting carried away - I honestly try to stay away from Iron and Wine for weeks at a time because I don't want to overload myself. Iron and Wine are the greatest musical vacation memory I know of - and I don't live in Paris - but shit if I don't find it the most amazing place in the world when I visit it.
Do yourself a favor and go DL or purchase some Iron and Wine. You'll thank me.
Songs of the Day - White Stripes:
I want to be the boy to warm your mother's heart -
I'm lonely but i ain't that lonely yet -
I like them the best sometimes when they go down this road...
Holy Fucking Cool
I just played with the new Iphone and I have to say that it may be the coolest fucking gadget ever created. I mean I'm sure there are photon lazers and fucking...rocket ships that shoot rats into the sun...but for the
If you have an extra 8 billion dollars I would suggest getting one. I personally am going to wait for version number 2 as it is pretty much policy never to buy the first version of anything.
Pandora Song List
Amazon Wish List
Revolutionary Wealth - Tofflers
Things Making Me Smile
Listening - [out of 5]
Benjy Ferree - 4.8
The Thermals 3.1
David Gray 3.8
Like the guy with the beard? YES - like the guy with the beers. What? Yep
Bands That I Check Schedules For
Badly Drawn Boy
Belle and Sebastian
The Black Keys
Drive By Truckers
Mark Hopkins Band
Iron and Wine
Mates of State
Two if By Sea
Places I Rock in the Flesh
The Knitting Factory
The Otto Bar
Places I Eat/Drink in the Flesh
Cross Street Market
No Way Jose
The Irish Pub
The Waterfront Hotel
My Greatest Hits (that's so lame)
The time I almost killed a child
July 4th in Korea
Excerpts from Demian
Why I screen phone calls
Bret's Death Metal Report
A conversation at a cocktail party
A conversation at breakfast
So you think you are a Baltimorian
A conversation about a girl singer
Observations from a bar
Observations of strippers
Why I love Oasis
I would go to war
"You Son of a Bitch" An Open Letter to Tom Friend
Dance to Your Ocean
When men become pussies
Jason Whitlock is a racist propaganda promoter
Pitchfork takes music snobbery to new level
The Cosmic Clash of the Red Sox and Cubs
The Hatred that is Runts Candy
Starting corporate line-up
Do you know me? List 1 / List 2 / List 3
The Night I Burned Philly Down
So You Want to be a Booze Hound
She Said it was Free
Funniest Corporate Story Ever
Striped Shirts and the Fucks that Wear Them
Pieces of Morning
Oasis Album Revew
The Art of Tipping
Starting Fires With Grass Stains
Bret's Federal Hill Food Review
Sexcapades and your Picture on the Internet
Stupid Secrets the Return
Stuff I Swing By From Time to Time
Indie Video Archive
Large Hearted Boy
Pitch Fork Media
Scenestars MP3 Blogs
Sound Garden Baltimore
Angry Little Girls
Junior Varsity Meat Market
Baltimore City Paper
The Baltimore Sun
Villa Julie College Baseball
06/01/2003 - 07/01/2003
07/01/2003 - 08/01/2003
08/01/2003 - 09/01/2003
09/01/2003 - 10/01/2003
10/01/2003 - 11/01/2003
11/01/2003 - 12/01/2003
12/01/2003 - 01/01/2004
01/01/2004 - 02/01/2004
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2005 - 06/01/2005
06/01/2005 - 07/01/2005
07/01/2005 - 08/01/2005
08/01/2005 - 09/01/2005
09/01/2005 - 10/01/2005
10/01/2005 - 11/01/2005
11/01/2005 - 12/01/2005
12/01/2005 - 01/01/2006
01/01/2006 - 02/01/2006
02/01/2006 - 03/01/2006
03/01/2006 - 04/01/2006
04/01/2006 - 05/01/2006
05/01/2006 - 06/01/2006
06/01/2006 - 07/01/2006
07/01/2006 - 08/01/2006
08/01/2006 - 09/01/2006
09/01/2006 - 10/01/2006
10/01/2006 - 11/01/2006
11/01/2006 - 12/01/2006
12/01/2006 - 01/01/2007
01/01/2007 - 02/01/2007
02/01/2007 - 03/01/2007
03/01/2007 - 04/01/2007
04/01/2007 - 05/01/2007
05/01/2007 - 06/01/2007
06/01/2007 - 07/01/2007
07/01/2007 - 08/01/2007
08/01/2007 - 09/01/2007
09/01/2007 - 10/01/2007
10/01/2007 - 11/01/2007
11/01/2007 - 12/01/2007
12/01/2007 - 01/01/2008
01/01/2008 - 02/01/2008
02/01/2008 - 03/01/2008
03/01/2008 - 04/01/2008
04/01/2008 - 05/01/2008
05/01/2008 - 06/01/2008
06/01/2008 - 07/01/2008
07/01/2008 - 08/01/2008
08/01/2008 - 09/01/2008
09/01/2008 - 10/01/2008
10/01/2008 - 11/01/2008
11/01/2008 - 12/01/2008
12/01/2008 - 01/01/2009
01/01/2009 - 02/01/2009
02/01/2009 - 03/01/2009
03/01/2009 - 04/01/2009
04/01/2009 - 05/01/2009
05/01/2009 - 06/01/2009
06/01/2009 - 07/01/2009
07/01/2009 - 08/01/2009
08/01/2009 - 09/01/2009
09/01/2009 - 10/01/2009
10/01/2009 - 11/01/2009
11/01/2009 - 12/01/2009
12/01/2009 - 01/01/2010
01/01/2010 - 02/01/2010
02/01/2010 - 03/01/2010
03/01/2010 - 04/01/2010
04/01/2010 - 05/01/2010
05/01/2010 - 06/01/2010
06/01/2010 - 07/01/2010
07/01/2010 - 08/01/2010
08/01/2010 - 09/01/2010
09/01/2010 - 10/01/2010
10/01/2010 - 11/01/2010
11/01/2010 - 12/01/2010
12/01/2010 - 01/01/2011
01/01/2011 - 02/01/2011
02/01/2011 - 03/01/2011
03/01/2011 - 04/01/2011
04/01/2011 - 05/01/2011
05/01/2011 - 06/01/2011
06/01/2011 - 07/01/2011
12/01/2011 - 01/01/2012
01/01/2012 - 02/01/2012
07/01/2012 - 08/01/2012
08/01/2012 - 09/01/2012
09/01/2012 - 10/01/2012
10/01/2012 - 11/01/2012
11/01/2012 - 12/01/2012
01/01/2013 - 02/01/2013
04/01/2013 - 05/01/2013
06/01/2013 - 07/01/2013
07/01/2013 - 08/01/2013
08/01/2013 - 09/01/2013
09/01/2013 - 10/01/2013
10/01/2013 - 11/01/2013
11/01/2013 - 12/01/2013
12/01/2013 - 01/01/2014
01/01/2014 - 02/01/2014
02/01/2014 - 03/01/2014
03/01/2014 - 04/01/2014
04/01/2014 - 05/01/2014
05/01/2014 - 06/01/2014
06/01/2014 - 07/01/2014
07/01/2014 - 08/01/2014
08/01/2014 - 09/01/2014
10/01/2014 - 11/01/2014
11/01/2014 - 12/01/2014
12/01/2014 - 01/01/2015
01/01/2015 - 02/01/2015
02/01/2015 - 03/01/2015
03/01/2015 - 04/01/2015
04/01/2015 - 05/01/2015
05/01/2015 - 06/01/2015
06/01/2015 - 07/01/2015
07/01/2015 - 08/01/2015
08/01/2015 - 09/01/2015
10/01/2015 - 11/01/2015
11/01/2015 - 12/01/2015
12/01/2015 - 01/01/2016
01/01/2016 - 02/01/2016
03/01/2016 - 04/01/2016
06/01/2016 - 07/01/2016
07/01/2016 - 08/01/2016
08/01/2016 - 09/01/2016
10/01/2016 - 11/01/2016
11/01/2016 - 12/01/2016
02/01/2017 - 03/01/2017
03/01/2017 - 04/01/2017
04/01/2017 - 05/01/2017
05/01/2017 - 06/01/2017
07/01/2017 - 08/01/2017
08/01/2017 - 09/01/2017